Stupid Wedding

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Nerd Bride

Oh nerd bride, how you bring me so much joy! Having worked with several of you over the last 12 years, you have a special place in my heart.

From your snorty, awkward laugh, to the droning on and on about your latest D&D winning accomplishments, to the extremely detailed description of your newest authentic leather dagger holster and other subject that I couldn’t care less about, it’s all so delightful. Whether it be the Star Wars themed cake, the gothic wedding gown or your steam punk accessories, your goal in having a memorable wedding has been accomplished. Sure, I may not know the details of your ridiculous ceremony (Klingon priest and all), because I’ve been drowning you out this whole time (don’t worry, the drool from fallen asleep while doing your hair makes a great gel substitute), I’m still happy for you.

These are the moments I know that I’ve chosen the right profession and am making a difference in this world.  You can barely tell I put makeup on your face, because you didn’t “want to go overboard” and I braided your scraggly, way too long hair. You feel beautiful and that’s what’s important. Most importantly, despite what others may have told you, you found someone with the same uncommon, boring ass interests. And by getting married, you and your nerd groom are taking two more singles off the dating market, thus saving the normals from a potential, future awful date.

Filed under nerd bride nerd wedding lol funny themed weddings